Jack of All Trades, Master of None

I want so many things at once.

And it's not healthy anymore. I am too selfish for my own sake.

Perhaps my interviewer was right when he told me that I need to focus on my future and with what I really want with my life. I guess my resume is a solid proof that I have diverse interests ranging from Human Resource Management to Research and Writing. At first I thought it was cool, because I can be anything I want. But then, I came to realize that it was far from that. I remain to be jack of all trades, master of none

I tried to be an artist, a multimedia junkie, an educator, an anthropologist, a writer, and an employee. They all worked out for me, except for the latter part I think (refer to the previous entry). I just want to explore all my potentials and capabilities, because I want to tell my grandchildren in the future that I had been this and that. Unfortunately, companies want someone who has a direction in life. And that's not me.

I have no direction in life. I have no idea what my career will look like five to ten years from now. Mainly because I have simple needs and simple goals in life. I have not thought of buying a car, because all I need is a decent home where I can eat my mom's cuisine. I have not thought of staying in a company for more than five years, because I want to do something more humane than that. Life is too short only to be spent in a routinary job. I have not thought of any other long term goals because I only have one: to renovate our house. I mean it. I guess if I answered that to my (future) interviewers, they will never understand. Because they will expect my answer to be more work-related shit. I hate to disappoint, but yes. That's the only long term goal that I have in mind.

I have no direction in life, because I want to live life one day at a time. It's funny, because people want to do just that, but they can never understand what it means. I have no focus, because I want so many little things at once. But the thing is, I want only one big thing which people will never understand.

That is to be profound.

Okay. So What?

I got a job. A real one.

(Yeah, I know I sounded unhappy in my last post but that's just me being bitchy about the tax). So here is the story behind my first real employment...

I applied to the HR/Admin Assistant position, and I was invited for an interview (that was Wednesday). I got excited. June 2. First Wednesday of the month. The moment that I received the message from the Office Manager, I told myself that I am set to pursue HR. I have made up my mind, in short. But as it seemed that day, HR has decided on me as well: It does not want me.

I was told, as the interview went on, that I was not qualified for the position simply because the firm preferred someone with experience in the field (i.e. Policy Making and other HR/Admin Stuff that I was not able to learn at the university). I was not qualified. The sad reality every fresh graduate must face: Being not qualified because of lack of experience.

Yes, it sounded as if a hopeless case but it did not. The Office Manager pointed out, "I could have set aside your resume since you do not have the most important qualification for the position you are applying to, but I saw something in your resume. You are well-credentialed, that's why I am going to discuss to you about the other positions in this firm."

The bottom line: the Office Manager offered me another position. He deemed that I would be better in that position. So he referred me (I just met him that day, I had no connections with him whatsoever) to that position, telling me that my resume would compete against the resume of other applicants (applicants to the same position) with Latin Honors. I just said yes (primarily because I was too sabaw to digest what was happening). That very same day I was interviewed by the Partner, Managing Associate, and Supervisor. That very same day. After the long interview, I had the exam. (Yes, I had the exam after I was interviewed). I had a long and tiring day (and it was all worth it, I guess). The parting words that I heard the Office Manager said was something like, "We'll get in touch with you Wednesday next week. Or maybe earlier than Wednesday." and something like, "Malay mo next time na mag-usap tayo, details na ng offer ang pag-uusapan." But I did not want to assume just yet, because I did not want to be jinxed (read previous blog entries).

The next thing I knew was waking up the next day and reading a message that came from the Office Manager stating, "The firm is set to make an offer to you. Hope you are okay tomorrow at 11am to discuss the details." And the only words that came out of my mouth was Oh God.

Another bottom line: I accepted the job. Hence my employed status.

However, I got interested at the job posting of the position that I have accepted. So I search online. And there you go (look at the picture above). The qualifications of an Insurance and Claims Specialist. My jaw just dropped at Fresh Graduates who belong to top 25% of the graduating class are encouraged to apply, and With experience working in an insurance company... I was not even a Cum Laude, and certainly I did not have any working experience in the field of insurance. (Plus the fact that my course is far from Legal Management or such disciplines!)

I must be born really Lucky! And yes, I am bragging this. I am sorry.

Tax is a bitch.

I got the job.

I should be happy right now. My bum days are coming to an end. But no. I am somewhere in between happy and sad just because of the tax. Crap. I miss the days when all I had to think about were exams, photocopying fees, and beer. But now, I have to think of a budget because I don't get an allowance from my mom. Now, I have to be wise with my money. And I have to pay the tax (which is the saddest part!!!) I also have to give back to my family (required!).

I have waited for this moment. Seriously. I thought that I would jump for joy and cry for merriment. I have waited for that kind of moment. But it never came. All I felt were a sudden rush of doubt and fear in me. The Am I sure to accept this epiphany came to me. I have seen the pros and cons of this job in a flash. I need to be patient and persevering. I have to. I need to be competitive. And fear is eating me alive, but I accepted the job offer.

I am about to venture to another chapter of my life. I am about to see the changes that will take course. I am about to unfold my future. Just because I got the job and I need to pay the tax.

Lady Luck is on my side!

When it rains, it pours.

Humble. An adjective that I believe is not suitable for me. I am not humble. I guess it has something to do with the schools I have been to and the blood that's running in my veins (Santos). But lately, I have had some humbling experience that taught me to be humble and proud at the same time. Proud in the sense that I am from a good school and shit. And humble in a way that though I am from a good school, I still have a lot to learn. I am still lacking.

So there. I learned so much shit that I have decided to keep my mouth shut. But I have learned as well to speak when needed. (And I don't see why I am telling these things HERE).

Anyway. So positive thinking and good vibes worked for me. The result came sooner than expected, and it was sweeter than I thought. I just hope that everything will turn out good for me tomorrow. (I'll dig the details once it's rightfully mine.)

I am keeping my fingers still crossed. Nothing beats Badjula and visualization!

Rolling Luck.

High hopes. Good vibes. Let the good time roll.

Make or break moment for me next Wednesday. I hope that the results and Lady Luck will be good to me. No, I still don't want to spill the details. I'll just dissect it once it is sure. Please. I do not want to be jinxed.

Good vibes! Good vibes! I hope my mom would not ruin it for me. I really want to work outside the boundaries of our home and to explore my potentials as an individual. I want to meet new people (though that is scary at the same time), make new friends, and learn new things I want to have a personal growth.

I am crossing my fingers for next Wednesday's events. Will it change the course of my life? Well, I really hope so. Wednesday. Wednesday. Wednesday.

There. Another rejection came in.

I would like to make myself believe that another rejection does not matter anymore.

Rejection is not fatal. Rejection is not fatal. Rejection is not fatal.

Yes, I am convincing myself. Kbye, I am off to mend my ego.

10 Things I Learned in Job Hunting

The following are the things that I learned in the Job Hunting 101 Fieldwork AKA Pre-employment exam/Interview.

Know the company profile. Before you confirm your attendance to the company's invitation, know the company first. Even though you are up only for an exam, it is always a must the you know something about the company. Because most of the time, their company profile is related to the exam you will be having. And in the interview they will also ask you about what you know about the company. So be prepared.

Know what you are signing up for. Most fresh graduates have the tendency to apply and apply and apply (repeat till fade) without knowing and understanding first the job description. (Though most of the time, the companies do not really give a comprehensive job description so fresh graduates are not to be blamed all the way.) It is a requirement to know what position you are applying. Know if you are qualified, not qualified, or overqualified to the position before you send out your resume, so that in the interview you'll not be shocked to know that you applied for a job that you do not want.

Be on-time. Duh! This should not be included here! It is a requirement that you are at the venue 10 to 15 minutes earlier than your schedule. (This is more of a note to myself, don't worry. So don't mind this.) Be also aware of the company's concept of time. If you are scheduled for an interview at 2pm, and yet the interviewer is still having lunch break until 3pm, then you should start thinking if this company is worth your time. I have this kind of experience. I think, no one should be kept waiting for more than 30 minutes because the employer is still having a break (any invalid/unprofessional excuse).

Be fashionable. In an acceptable way. Know the right trend for the right occasion. Avoid wearing printed tops mixed with printed bottoms. And please! Avoid the floral print. I know how it is a trend nowadays, but come on. This is not a summer get-away. Also, wear decent skirts. This is not just-another-day-in-school thing.

Be dignified. Appearance is the first thing people see in us. Let's admit it, most of the time we judge the people around us based on how they look and how they dress. In looking for a job, it is a must that the applicant should dress up accordingly and appropriately. It is also a must that the applicant gives justice, dignity and angst to what s/he wears. It is not enough that the applicant has a good pair of corporate attire. I have seen some applicants who wear super suits, but they do not look like dignified at all.

Be smart. When the employer asks you something, be smart in answering. It is not enough that the you have good academic records. Most of the times, the way you bring yourself has more points than what is written on your curriculum vitae. Carry yourself in a manner that will give the employers an image of someone who is not only intelligent, but also street smart. Don't be too timid and shy, because that won't bring you anywhere. But don't be too assertive as well. You don't want to make a bad impression, right?

Be prepared. Always bring an extra copy of your curriculum vitae, even though you are in for the pre-employment exam. It comes very handy most of the time, believe me. And please, know/remember what position you are applying for.

Bring extra everything. Extra pen, extra clothes, extra shoes... Extra everything. BUT! Do not get bring too much of everything. The essentials I have in my bag are a pair of clothes and flat shoes. Usually, I change my outfit after the pre-employment exam or job interview. I am just not comfortable enough in projecting my corporate image. (Changing outfit is optional).

Don't bring your parents with you. Seriously? It is not a PTA meeting.

Bring your brains. Okay, enough said.

Keep it coming!

The ordeal was done! More to come, I guess (?).

I had the exam. Only this: It is indeed a learning experience. I was right with my predictions (Badjual's predictions!!). The exam was not the usual Global Reasoning Type of Exam. It was more on Economics.

The exam was divided into four parts: Economic Issues, Foreign Countries, Law, and Why part. Essay type (the type of exam I would have loved if I were still in college). When the I had an overview of the exam, I (sarcastically) smiled to myself and made a silent oath. I knew right there and then that I would not be able to pass the exam. It was perfectly tailored for graduates of economics. But still, I tried. There's no harm and trying, I told myself.

In short, I was able to answer basic questions in each part (and I don't know if my answers are right, but I tried my best to stick to the core values of economics: supply and demand and market). In the first part (economic issues), I left two questions unanswered simply because I did not know the answer. What is the difference among mutual fund, a bond, and a share fund? My high school memories of Economics failed me. I did not get that part stored in my long-term memory. And the other question involved a 10% deficit in GDP. In the second part (Foreign countries) I was only able to answer two out of the three questions asked. The question I was not able to answer has something to do with OCEP (which I don't have a single idea what it is). As for the Law part, I did not answer it at all. I told myself, why would I try to give some bullshit answers to the questions I have no idea about? I'd rather not answer the questions than give a bullshit answer. It is not an academic exam in the first place. There'll be no points for effort. As for the finale, the Why part. To this I admit that I have given my best shot. Why would you want to work for (insert name of company here)? This is what I wrote: Though my knowledge of economics is at the basic level, my passion and interest in the field of research and economic trends and issues will make up for the lack of deep technical knowledge of Economics. I believe that (insert the name of the company here) will provide a venue for me to hone my research and writing skills.

I know, it sucks but at least I tried.

So there, when I already accepted the fact that I won't be able to get close to passing the exam, I volunteered for an experiment they are conducting (since I need to do something good aka make pabibo LOL). After the experiment and a series of questions, I was up to go home. But the founder asked me: So where did you get your Economics degree? To which I have replied honestly, I do not have an Economics degree, Sir. Actually, I am a graduate of Behavioral Sciences. He seemed puzzled, Then you must have had a hard time answering the exam?. I smiled, When it comes to the technical questions, I did, Sir.

The conversation continued until he learned that I had units of Economic Anthropology back in college (which is the closest subject I have to Economics). He got interested and said that he studied some subjects in Anthropology as well. He asked me what written works I have read in relation to Economics and Economic Anthropology. And I could only thank my photographic memory for this. I told him Malinowski, Polanyi, Adam Smith, and Marx (I was not even sure of Karl Marx then).

What is the relevance of this conversation in the whole aspect of my failed exam and non-Economics degree? At the end of the conversation, the founder told: I think we (may) have a position for you in the Yields Team. How'd you find that? Before I could get what he meant, he told his only employee present, You think it's boring for her? To which he answered, Not at all.

I am still not getting it. Did they just offer me a position? I don't want to get my hopes high, but that's just what I heard.

Major WHUT.

So I have an exam tomorrow at 9am for the Associate Economics Researcher position.

When I sent my application via email, I thought that the HR of that company will not even look at my resume and sample works. Surprisingly, I received an email, telling me that they scheduled me for an exam. Shiz. I thought for a second: Should I pursue this? Economics?! WTH. Bahala na! I have no idea what kind of exam I will have tomorrow. Is it the usual Global Reasoning Test or is it something related to Economics? If it is the first one, then I have no problem. It'll be UPCAT all over again. If it is the latter, then that's where my major problem lies.

I am not an Economics graduate. My knowledge of Economics only includes the law of supply and demand, and Adam Smith's Laissez-Faire. That's all. I know little about jargons in Economics. And the only hard core economics unit that I had in the university was Economic Anthropology, which I enjoyed a lot (but gradually forgot about). I am not an expert, so to speak. But I have an interest in this field. Crap. How can I compete to those who have a degree in Economics or Business Econ?

What to do now? I don't want to fail in comparison to the other candidates... I guess I have no other choice but to study Economics now? Or I might as well rely on my fourth year high school memories of Economics.

Drama Queen

I wish I could stop binge blogging.

Lately, I have been so bored that I could not help myself but update (and update and update and update *repeat till fade*) my blog with some family dramas. I wish I could stop myself from spilling information more than I should. I wish I could write something sensible, but whatever.

Anyway, I am supposed to study for an exam tomorrow at 9am. Exams exams exams! When will I have a job? Seriously? Come on. I am tired of having exams and undergoing mental workouts. I need something more definite than exams. I want a job. I need a job. Okay, I sound whiny here. Blah blah blah. That's why I call myself the Drama Queen.

Now I am thinking that being jobless is more of a bad karma to me than of a result of my resume's mediocrity. I must admit that I did not attend some interview invitations when I don't like the company profile. I am that snob. And I repent for all the bad deeds that I committed. Or not. But whatever. I need a decent job. Please.

And I wish I could start writing some sensible stuff. Hello coherence, where art thou?

Zombies ate my brains!!!

When I stepped out of the university, I thought that I would not undergo any paper and pencil exams. I thought I was over it. I thought I was far from the stressful days of dreading an exam. I thought I would not be able to undergo heavy mental workout anymore. Oh boy, I was entirely wrong.

Little did I know that before getting the job of my dreams, I must endure the grueling experience of answering a pre-employment exam. I thought it was just the interview that I should dwell with. BUT NO! There are aptitude exams (most of the time) which consist of logic, abstract reasoning, numerical test, and sometimes grammar and vocabulary. Seriously. I thought I was over the UPCAT-stage of my life.

Recently, I had gone to different companies to take their examinations and it usually consumed my energy just going to the exam location. I had to travel long hours for an hour or so of examination, had to experience the rush hour, and had to stay optimistic at the results of the exams (after doing the B system) only to go home wearing a screaming tag on my forehead: UNEMPLOYED.

It was physically draining and mentally consuming. It was like zombies ate my brain.