Last night, I went over some things in my life that need an overhaul. I have been busy lately that I wasn’t able to wrap my whole life accordingly. In the past few weeks, I was a mess, a total mess. I have been consumed by events that mean nothing metaphysical to me. All the things around me were real, but nothing mattered. I have been in a total whirlwind so to speak. My life was in a limbo. So I decided to take a break and think. And last night, the fear that made me do stupid things overwhelmed me again.
But I was able to overcome it. It was not easy. It took me years to finally accept that I am afraid of failing. And it took me many battles just to defeat my own fear. And last night, after a gazillion of battles I have fought, I won. But it was not an easy battle—nothing was, nothing is, and nothing will ever be.
I have been a prisoner of my own fear, that I realized when I woke up the next day. Little fear can cripple even a great man in the making. But I won’t let it loom my decisions in life. Never again. I might be still scared, but it won’t cripple me again. For I remember a great line from one of my favorite poems, Invictus: “I am the master of my soul, I am the captain of my fate.”
Friday, February 12, 2010
Invictus
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ReplyDeleteVery well written! :) I was inspired by your blog entry. Don't be afraid to fail... we cannot be winners all the time. As a saying goes, in every failure there is an opportunity. Just keep exploring things, do what you think will help you achieve your dreams. When you stumble, pick up yourself and start all over again. Don't stop dreaming, anyway it's free. I really believe you'll go places someday. :) Don't forget me, okay? :) Hahaha. Love you!
ReplyDeleteP.S. Dinelete ko yung unang comment kasi may wrong spelling.
@Pastel. Haha. Thanks. :) I agree, we cannot be winners all the time.
ReplyDeleteP.S. You're really a good writer! Continue expressing yourself and sharing your intelligent ideas. Not all people are blessed with such talent and intellect. You're very lucky! :)
ReplyDeleteThanks! But I still have so much to learn and do to prove myself worthy of the adjective "good" writer.
ReplyDelete