Today, I will rant.
With the recent events in my life, I don't know how to feel anymore. I mean, I almost got into law school, almost had my dream job (Barista at Starbucks), almost had someone special, almost blah blah blah. Almost, but not quite. I am always hanging by a moment, slightly tasting and feeling the high, but something always has to happen. Something happens all the time. Either I am bad at timing or I am just jinxed to the eternal doom of almost, but not quite kind of life. I don't know what to think of anymore. I don't know what to feel anymore. I don't know where I stand, I don't know what to do anymore.
I am not tired, I just feel lost. Lost in the moment of uncertainty. Lost in the fucks of life. Lost in everything. There's still hope, so they say, but I just wish it could let me survive until the end of the year.
One day, I will be someone else. I will be somebody I long to be. I will be a better person. Soon. But for now, let me be just this wrecked, hyperactive, anti-social 21-year old girl who doesn't know what's happening in her life despite all the planning and all.
With this, I shall end my note with...
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